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 Getting Married ... Again ... And Again ...

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malcolm
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PostSubject: Re: Getting Married ... Again ... And Again ...   Mon Nov 24, 2014 8:26 am

andsome wrote:
I think everyone should have a say as to how they are disposed of

Why ?
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PostSubject: Re: Getting Married ... Again ... And Again ...   Mon Nov 24, 2014 8:28 am

malcolm wrote:
andsome wrote:
I think everyone should have a say as to how they are disposed of

Why ?


Why not??  It's my carcass. cool

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malcolm
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PostSubject: Re: Getting Married ... Again ... And Again ...   Mon Nov 24, 2014 8:34 am

Your body is yours while you are alive but when you die your carcass belongs to your next of kin and it is their prerogative to decide on the disposal.....a dead person owns nothing !
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PostSubject: Re: Getting Married ... Again ... And Again ...   Mon Nov 24, 2014 8:39 am

As I said, we will have to agree to differ, our kids are happy to abide by our wishes.

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PostSubject: Re: Getting Married ... Again ... And Again ...   Mon Nov 24, 2014 9:13 am

andsome wrote:
As I said, we will have to agree to differ, our kids are happy to abide by our wishes.
But you will never know if they do or if they just throw you in a skip ! drum
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PostSubject: Re: Getting Married ... Again ... And Again ...   Mon Nov 24, 2014 9:37 am

malcolm wrote:
andsome wrote:
As I said, we will have to agree to differ, our kids are happy to abide by our wishes.
But you will never know if they do or if they just throw you in a skip ! drum
Unless you make it a condition of your will, otherwise your next of kin get bugger all.
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PostSubject: Re: Getting Married ... Again ... And Again ...   Mon Nov 24, 2014 9:53 am

A will is not usually read until AFTER the funeral, by then it is too late to make your wishes known, and it also has to go to probate.  We both have made wills, but have also made our last wishes known as described.  I suppose it all depends on your own personal relationships and degree of trust in your own family. Personally I have no doubts about our own kids.  cool

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PostSubject: Re: Getting Married ... Again ... And Again ...   Mon Nov 24, 2014 2:00 pm

Gawd ... don't get me started on wills.

I agree with andsome ... it's for the deceased person to leaves a record of how they would like their 'send-off' to be. Why not? They're paying for it out of the proceeds of their will.

However, in my experience ... there is nowt but backstabbing and arguments within the family.
When my mum died it was understood when our step-dad died their joint accumulation of life's riches would be split equally between the four of us.
You've all guessed where I'm going with this haven't you? teacup
The first will was split four ways and sat in dusty office  ... and then another will appeared ..this one  which my elder brother got my step-dad to make was done at home with a solicitor present and was reduced to just my two brothers inheriting. Me and my sister got nowt.
This was at the time both my brothers had a scrap over power of attorney.
By the time my step-dad died after a hospital cock-up for which my brother sued them .. another will was found on a computer, my elder brother's computer, no surprise there.
The upshot been that he got about 300k to 400k for himself.

I did consult a solicitor about challenging the will .. but I would have had to try and overturn two to get back to the original. My chances were not good .. and ... they had stopped legal aid over this kind of family dispute for as the solicitor told me the great majority of legal aid was now directed to asylum seekers. He did say if it was criminal, say for instance .. I murdered my brother I could qualify for legal aid.
But I didn't want to go to those lengths and kill him really ..

Did it benefit my brother and give him a happy life?
No. To this day I believe it is tainted money and when he died it went out of the family to his ex--step-kids who went around telling everyone he was their dad. I checked, he never adopted them but they had legally changed their names by Deed Poll. They took control over his burial after they said they found a will under his bed in a box file leaving everything to them.
They threatened to call the police when I went down to his old house (previously mum's)  asking after family keepsakes. (my granddad's medals and other stuff of no use to them, only to find they'd been sold).
They refused to allow me to visit him in the Chapel of Rest without their express written permission.
They handled the funeral etc but the hospital had to pester them because after 5 or 6 days he was still lying uncollected in the hospital morgue.

I hope the cursed money makes them happy.

So yes everyone .. make a will but make sure there is only one of them.
Whilst I am thinking of writing my memoirs... for fun.
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PostSubject: Re: Getting Married ... Again ... And Again ...   Mon Nov 24, 2014 3:27 pm

So sorry to hear of your troubles.  We are lucky that our kids keep bullying us to spend spend spend.  Their argument being that we have worked hard for our money, and they want us to enjoy as much of it as we can before it is too late. cool

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PostSubject: Re: Getting Married ... Again ... And Again ...   Mon Nov 24, 2014 3:57 pm

Sounds like they're giving you good advice andsome... and I have to say they sound a good bunch of kids.

I'm from a dysfunctional family didn't ya know drum

I shall be spending as much of my own hard won dosh as I can.


Last edited by sags on Mon Nov 24, 2014 9:14 pm; edited 1 time in total
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PostSubject: Re: Getting Married ... Again ... And Again ...   Mon Nov 24, 2014 7:08 pm

I was married twice.  The first one, a serial womaniser lasted 5 years. I met my second husband and lived with himfor many, many years.  Because of tax issues, it didn't pay us to get married as we could run two businesses and not pay VAT...thus saving thousands each year.  When he had his stroke, we had to shut down the businesses so decided we might as well get married to sort out the house etc. Plus, the hospital was being funny about me being next of kin.
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